Friday, January 14, 2011

Pre-op depression?

Funny that I can diagnose him better than he can! I have no doubt that he's in pre-op depression right now. Ugh! Two more weeks of this? I wish he could be a little more like me. I've chosen to be positive about everything. And if I'm wrong, we'll deal with it when we have to. He's chosen the direct opposite path and is thinking nothing is worth anything.

How on earth does he expect me to stay positive? I am really trying hard today to overcome his depression and it's just not all that easy. He sighs all the time. Has this mopey look about himself. Doesn't even try to get my jokes. (Now, that hurts! LOLOL!!!)

I know it's just something that he has to go through....but I'm sorry to say that the rest of us have to go through it with him.

So today, I buried myself in my art! I've been hired by a local store to teach classes one night a week - something to force me out into the art world. They seem to be more than willing to work around my schedule with him, so I took them up on their offer to teach!

I've planned a pizza party tomorrow night with friends who have little girls that he adores. And my sis is coming down for the weekend with her husband. So I'm hoping this will force him out of his depression.

On the other hand - his birthday is next week.....yeah, I understand "that" depression! LOLOL!!!

I've made up my mind - it's going to be a great weekend! Hope yours is too!

DW

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Kidney stints???

There are multiple surgeons preparing for hubby's operations. One of them called to talk to him about his appendix incision from 30 years ago. It might be in the way of where they want to put kidney stints.

KIDNEY STINTS?????

No one mentioned that!

So I did my google research and actually, I think they might be a good thing for this kind of surgery. Protection in the event there is blockage.

But don't you love it how "information" arrives? via a phone call? about a 30 year old incision?

That surgeon called back today and said after looking at more xrays and records, he's decided the incision isn't going to be in the way.

And I am pleased that they are wanting to take steps to protect his kidneys. They only function at 22% right now. We need to preserve them as long as possible.

Tomorrow he goes to get fitted for his back brace. Another 1 hour drive there and an hour back.

Yesterday, we drove and hour to the hospital for him to bank his 3rd pint of blood. His hematocrit was too low (by 1 point) so he called the surgeon who said they were delighted he had manaaged to bank 2 pints and to not worry about the 3rd pint. So a 2 hour drive for nothing. But you have to do these things to get ready.

And I wonder why I'm tired all the time? :o)

I'm so grateful to have my sisters. I call when I get down. I called today. I do think it's wearing me out. I'm fighting depression. Fighting the unknown, the "what-if's". Trying hard to stay positive for him. She gave me a 20 minute pep talk and I was fine after that. We decided the "key" is one of 2 things;

1. Give in to the feelings, eat chocolate, watch a movie, fall asleep and wake up ready to go

or

2. Take on a project. Get busy. Do something. Be active. Ignore the sadness and the fears. Put it all in God's hands.

Today, I picked # 2 and was so busy in a half hour that I forgot about his problems!

Now, if I can just remember that the next time.....

DW